American Bruiser VS Undersea Loser

Commissioner Queried; Responds with New Video

Recently the Kaiju Commissioner received a letter from hardcore fan Jay, inquiring about Call-Me-Kevin's Big Battel win-loss record.

Dear Commissioner,

I keep hearing that Call-Me-Kevin is the biggest loser in the history of the Big Battel. People like Louden Noxious, and all his followers on the Kaiju Big Board, always say that he's never won a match. Well that's bunk! I distinctly remember a Battel where he didn't lose - it was in Brooklyn at the Warsaw and I swear that the big guy was victorious. Can you please set the record straight?!

Sincerely,
Jay

Upon receiving Jay's letter, the Commissioner immediately set to work confirming the story by combing through the vast video archives of Kaiju Big Battel. After several days of painstaking, arduous work, the Commissioner was hand delivered a video that proves without a doubt that Jay's memory is about as reliable as that used Jaguar your middle aged uncle just bought.

Watch American Beetle VS Call-Me-Kevin Part 1 and see the evidence for yourself. Part 2 will be posted next week.

New DVD Deal

People love a deal - maybe that's why the Kaiju Super Fan Pack (with a T-shirt, Terebi Sento DVD, and more) has been such a hot seller - and now that the new Kaiju DVD Shocking Truth is out, the masses have been clamoring for a new deal. Well here it is - for the low price of $29.99 you get the Shocking Truth DVD and your pick of a classic Kaiju T-Shirt. Plus we'll throw in a couple of monster magnets (the collectible decoration, not the stoner rock band) to sweeten the pot. We're calling this the Shocking DVD/T-shirt Deal. Head over to the Kaiju Mall now, to check it out.

In other Mall news, the Commissioner has been so happy with the response to the new Kaiju T-shirts, he's cutting the price of the Com-minionist T-Shirt and the Cube Power T-Shirt to $15.00. And don't forget to check out the new highly collectable, limited edition Apes of Wraths T too!

Question of the Week

What mysterious creature is lurking in Dino Kang's Cave at the end of Shocking Truth?

Cube Hates Cessnas

In what can only be described as Dr. Cube's most peculiar plot yet, the evil madman attempted yesterday to besmirch the good name of Cessna aircraft, using SDS-1 and a home-made holographic projector. Early in the afternoon, Cube dispatched SDS-1 to make a fly-by of Washington D.C. with the Cubometrix Holo-tron 1200 strapped to his back. Using the Holo-tron's advanced holographic technology, Cube made it appear as though SDS-1 was actually a single-engine 1977 Cessna airplane. The resulting scare, including a full alert and the evacuation of both Capitol Hill and the White House, led to a Cessna sell-off on Wall Street that left the company in dire financial straits. Cube's plot was revealed however when SDS-1, after being forced down by two F-16 fighter jets, had to disable the holograph before escaping through what one observer called a "giant, inter-dimensional Georgia O'Keefe painting in the sky."

So far there has been no word on just what Cube's problem with Cessna is, but some point to a 1996 incident in which a Cessna jet Cube had planned to purchase but never pay for, was instead sold to Sean Combs, a well-known Fine Young Cannibals back-up dancer, who later dabbled in the high profile fields of music production, fashion, and Jennifer Lopez dating.